You're My One

Bryce and I were talking yesterday about our relationship, and how happy we are to get to go to school together. He said something that really stuck with me. When discussing his opinion on Women reaching their dreams, we were talking about his stance as a feminist. To us, feminism isn't about making men and women the same, it's about empowering women, and allowing them to do whatever they set their minds to. Trusting them with those most important works with which they alone can make a difference. It's about trusting women to be good and do good, not limiting their impact on the work but instead enhancing and multiplying their goodness. We're a team, and our goal is for both of us to soar.

Bryce has a unique perspective from having 6 sisters, and a mother who raised him. He's been around women his whole life. And as such, he's my biggest fan. He knows I have a lot to give. He said his ultimate goal in life is to be sure that I am satisfied, to be sure I follow my dreams and have what I need, because I'm "his one". His one shot, chance, person, all of the above. His one to make soar. Just hearing that made my heart melt.

I love that idea of being his one. He's my biggest cheerleader; he cheers for me and motivates me, listens when things are hard, and helps me to find solutions when problems arise. With him, I can breathe fire. I'm his one who,  when supported by him can affect generations for good. I'm grateful for a husband who sees the greatness in me and constantly works to build me up and make me strong, who allows me to be good for more than just for him or our family but for the world around me. With him, my touch is limitless. He's my one too.

Week 1: The Scrub Life

Everyone has been telling me how miserable our lives in school were going to be when school started. But there isn't a real great way to know what to expect until school actually starts. So by the time the first day of school rolls around, I was just ready to go.

The first day of school wasn't so bad. If anything it was anticlimactic. We have a 5 hour long Geometric Optics class on Mondays which didn't prove to be too difficult. But Tuesday was a big day because that was the start of what we call "BASIG" or basic sciences. We talk all of those classes with the Dental students, and many of the professors are similar to the professors and lectures Bryce has in his basic science classes. Although, don't let the name fool you, because I think I learned as much as I learned or was supposed to learn in the last 4 years during those 12 hours of lecture this week

The sheer volume of information is what is hard about school. I have started to wonder if I have an attention deficient disorder (not entirely seriously) because it was so hard to focus. I don't know if it was just because of the content going so fast or because I'm coming back from summer, but the biggest struggle so far is staying focused throughout hours and hours of lecture. I have anywhere from 4-9 hours of lecture in a given day, and al to of staring and listening. I feel like if I lose track of my thought for even a second, I'm already behind. Which is stressful and can be frustrating when the room is super warm or you've just had lunch (which is everyday). This week, the lecture halls were SO warm! It was a fight to stay awake in class just for that reason. One day I even popped an Excedrine migraine just because I needed the caffeine to keep me awake! So I guess you can say I've used more caffeine than I ever did in undergrad already!

This is me, going to yoga on campus for the first time. Bryce was very excited about it and had to document!

As far as my class, there are 54 of us. There are about 20 girls in my class, about 3 of us are married. There are 12 people who are LDS, 3 of us went to BYU and I'm the only girl :) Lucky me! But it's nice having peers who I can relate to quickly, and I've been making an effort to make new friends and sit by someone new everyday. By the time they day is over, it is usually 4-5pm and I'm tired of sitting and staring a a screen. So exercise has been making a huge difference! The first day I felt so overwhelmed, and  I went to the gym only to find half the people there were in my class! So there really is no escape to somewhere comfortable I've found. But I'm getting more comfortable so that's good!

For classes were required to dress business clothes, unless we choose to wear scrubs, which are a lovely Galaxy Blue color! Scrubs are my new favorite, because my childhood dream of having a school uniform has finally come true. They are also a whole lot more comfortable to wear in this heat.

Another time Bryce was just so excited about my outfit he had to document. Love that guy!

I have my first test on Tuesday, I have then every Tuesday from 7-9am on the 12 BASIG lectures from the week before. I'm excited because I feel like I've studied pretty hard but also nervous because I'm not known for having amazing test taking abilities no matter how well I know the information. So I'm hoping that's changed! 

Working with Bryce this week has been a huge blessing. If anything,  I see him more often now that we're both in school because we can study together most nights and mornings we wake up at 6:30 and study as well. it's been a little tricky scheduling dinners and plans for school activities but we try to be there for each other's events like barbecues or school parties. He's really my teammate and the best sidekick I could ask for on this adventure!

Sidenote: We also spoke in church today! It was my first time speaking in church with Bryce much less hearing him speak. He got up and some of the sweetest things about me, I almost cried! Also, we've been called to the nursery. At first I was so bummed and sad, but now we are actually loving it! We have the youngest kids and they are just too sweet. Watching Bryce gives me all the heart eyes

Why Science Explains Everything

Why does science explain everything? It seems as though everyday there is a new study in the news or online telling us how to be smart or healthy or beautiful. The scientific method was designed to create controlled and tightly regulated experiments that most importantly are reproducible. Meaning if a study is done and then replicated anywhere at anytime, the same results will be recorded. Every. Single. Time. When it comes to science, most of what we know about the world has been contrived from accurate use of the scientific method replicated over and over again until we can say that we know without a doubt that the results are correct and statistically significant.

While studying microbiology at BYU, something I thought a lot about is most obviously how it works. I've been through hours and hours of lectures studying what proteins do what, what chemicals go where, and how it all works together, trying to remember it all as I went. If there is something I have spent time on, it's science.

One argument is that science and divinity are separate. That if we can find an answer for everything (which has been done in many fields, or so we think) then that will explain the need, or rather the lack of a need to believe in a divine power. If evolution is real and true and most importantly, logical, then God could not have created this world as so the scriptures say because evolution couldn't have happened in just 7 days. And I think that argument could go either way for anyone, meaning an individual's belief on the subject of science is entirely their own, some believe and some don't. If there is anything I have found, it is that those who take the time to understand science and dig into the methods are those who then believe the results. There is a reason why doctors prescribe exercise, dentists recommend flossing (besides the fact that 83% of wealthy people floss everyday), and the IT department recommends backing up your laptop to an external drive, and why I tell my family to replace their plastic cutting boards with glass ones. It's because these practices work. Not just once, but consistently.

I truly do believe that I will eventually be able to know everything. All of it. Where babies come from, how personalities are made, why we have obesity and diabetes, what the real meaning of life is, and why God made women have to go through periods and be feeling sick for nearly half their life (but seriously). I really do think there is a way to understand these things by spending time in a laboratory. I think acquiring this knowledge over a lifetime can do one of two things:

1. It can make someone people lose their responsibility towards a higher power, feel as though because "I understand these things I previously thought only God understood, I am no longer responsible to do what I thought he was telling me to do, because now I know, and maybe God doesn't exist if I truly can understand what others thought only he could".

2. It can also cause the opposite effect, and responsibility to our God can increase. "Because I now see what God sees, I must try to act as he does. I must be a more loving and humble servant because I have been blessed and I DO understand God's nature. Because I've learned so much from God, I want to continue to follow him and learn more".

But I do not believe the options are this extreme. I think the beauty of the gospel comes from a God who is logical. I can imagine it would be difficult to go through school always being told we will never get to be doctors, no matter how much we learn or understand, no matter if we one day know as much as our teachers know, it just wasn't possible to ever graduate. It would be hard to believe in that God.

From learning and growing in knowledge from those who are around us and teach us doesn't give most of us the idea to say "Okay, I'm done, I know all there is left to know so I'm going to go be my own doctor now". Yes, we do know the answers to most questions, and we do have a scientific way of explaining many of God's miracles if we really do try. But I do not believe that makes God any less of a God for using science that he created and understands to create a perfect world around us. Just because the world operates on a perfect science doesn't disprove God, but instead shows the depth and breadth of his knowledge. Studying science has brought me closer to God because by seeing what he sees and creating as creates, I am able to learn and grow into a person who sees and creates in the way that he does. I've climbed up to where he can see, and I can stop there or keep climbing, it's my choice.

I believe in a God who is not just all powerful, but also who is the master chemist. He understands proteins more than I ever will, can understand light and quantum theory, and psychology on a level I only dream of understanding. There is a misconception that all God wants is our time and love and fun and also everything we have. But I think God also wants us to know what he knows, not just spiritually but physically as well. The more I've studied science the more I've felt close to God because I have been becoming like him. I've learned to think as he does and view the world differently, through heavenly eyes that see the perfection in the world around me. Most scientists will tell you they love science because of the possibility or because there is always an answer to discover. Ironically, those are the things I love most about God as well. I see his personality when I study him under the microscope or in the stars or through the lens.

This topic is something I've thought about a lot. And like other scientists it would be nice if you'd take my word for it, but luckily you don't have to. Scientific method works here too. If you try to understand God, with real intent to know and see what he sees, I know you will find him. The choice to try and understand a problem or question is the first step in the scientific method, yet only through a period of controlled trial and error can anyone know for sure. By praying to know, looking for him all around you, and even more importantly having an unbiased desire to find truth, I know that God will show himself to you. I know this because he has done it for me every single time I have reached out, called out, or cried out for him. There is no soul he can not reach or mind he cannot understand. He is there waiting, with answers for anyone who seeks to find him.

So I guess what I'm saying begs the ultimate question , does science really explain everything? And I guess thats for you to find out yourself.